


It's the mark Dean...

by SuperWhoLock505



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anger, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt, Hurt Dean Winchester, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-06
Updated: 2015-05-06
Packaged: 2018-03-29 08:49:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3890068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperWhoLock505/pseuds/SuperWhoLock505
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean is slowly giving up on finding a cure for the mark of Cain. Can Sam and Castiel find a way to help Dean before it's too late..?</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's the mark Dean...

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, hope you enjoy!

"Dean it's for the best." Sam closed the top of his laptop and looked at Dean frowning, who was standing on the other side of the long table in the middle of the bunker.   
"I told you Sam there's nothing else to research! That's it! There's nothing else! The book, everything. Just...just leave it!" Dean knew Sam only wanted to help. He knew Sam was the only one who was basically giving up his life to finding a cure for the mark, but Dean knew there was nothing anyone could do now. It was too late. Sam looked away and drifted his eyes back to his closed laptop. Dean stood in the same place for a minute or two before he grabbed his coat and started to walk towards the door.   
"Where are you going?" Sam asked quietly still not looking at Dean.   
"Out. Just out." Dean replied as he reached the top of the stairs opening the large metal door and stepped outside into the cold, dark rain closing the door shut forcefully behind him. He quickly shoved his arms into the jacket and started walking in the direction of the impala. 

Minutes later Dean stepped into his beloved car, the rain was falling loudly on the roof. He pushed down the hand break and pressed his foot onto the accelerator, moving the car slowly forward up the old, narrow road. He didn't know where he was going but he knew one thing. He just wanted to get away. Away from everything. Just forget about it all for a while.  
He must had been driving for at least 2 hours and the rain hadn't worn off any. He eventually pulled off the dimly lit road he was on pulling down a small, pitch black track leading to what seemed like a small lake. Dean finally pulled up the hand break and got out of car. He perched himself on the bonnet of the impala gazing at the white stars dotting the sky. The rain was heavy but Dean didn't care. He just sat there. Staring. For the first time in a while he felt normal. Well almost. He actually felt that there wasn't anything to worry about. Not here anyway. He couldn't hurt anyone here. The thought of everything that is happening finally broke him. Tears started rolling down his face as he carried on staring forcefully at the sky. The rain was still falling and wiped away any evidence of tears on Dean's face. He rubbed his eyes harshly but he couldn't stop. All Dean could do now was cry. He didn't know what else to do. Sammy wouldn't listen. Nobody would listen. He just wanted someone to hear his side of the story for a change. About the mark. About how even if there was a small chance they could find a way to get rid of the mark it would be too late. Dean knew that. As the rain was pounding loudly on the ground Dean sank to the floor. The rain had seeped through his clothes and he was shaking violently from the cold dampness. He sat there still trying to hold his gaze on the brightest star. He couldn't do this anymore. He couldn't do it alone. He slowly closed his eyes and started to whisper, "Cas." His voice cracked with the tears he was fighting so hard to keep back. The one word was all he could manage as his emotions hit him like a gun shot though the heart.   
Nothing happened. Dean was still sitting in the rain on his own, slowly giving up on his life wrapping his arms around his legs and resting his head on his knees. He didn't know what else he could do now. He just wanted it to be over. All of it. He just wanted it to be gone. But, just then he felt a hand grip his shoulder tightly.   
"Dean." Cas. It was Cas. He came. Deans eyes flung open moving his head up to look at the angel the best he could through blurred vision. "It's okay." Cas said softly tilting his head slightly frowning down at Dean but trying his best to smile. Dean looked back to ground still trying to force his tears to stop. But he couldn't.   
"Cas." he coughed "I can't do it. I can't do this anymore." Cas kept his hand firmly on Dean's shoulder as he crouched down next to him. Dean felt like a idiot. Crying. He doesn't cry. But this time, he just couldn't help it. Cas looked from Dean to the sky and then back to Dean again. Cas wasn't used to situations like this. He had no idea what to say. No idea of how to make things better. How to make Dean better. But he knew one thing, it was killing him seeing Dean, the strong one, look so helpless and broken and then Cas finally came up with an idea.   
"Dean." He repeated taking his hand from Dean's shoulder and folded his arms. "I know things are difficult at the moment and I know things aren't exactly on our side either but, we will get through this. No matter what we have to do, things will get better. I promise. Just please Dean, please stay strong. We can't do it without you. I can't." Cas' voice trailed away as he saw Dean staring at him. His eyes wide glazed with tears and a small, sad smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. "...So, are you staying here all night because you might get hyperthermia or get seriously ill Dean..." Dean had to laugh. Cas went from being seriously scary and protective to a tiny, cute kitten within seconds.   
"Nahh, come on man." Dean pushed himself from the ground and wiped a hand over his face recovering as fast as he could, stretching out the other hand towards Cas offering to help him off the floor. And of course, Cas completely blanked Dean's hand and got up effortlessly on his own. Dean laughed again shaking his head walking around the car and stepped inside. Cas stood outside still, the raindrops streaming down his coat. Dean waved his hand at Cas leaning over to the other door and opening it. "Get in!" Dean shouted at him as Cas walked around and also stepped into the car. They were both sitting in the front of the impala completely drenched but at that minute, Dean couldn't care less. He was just happy. Happy that Cas actually came and gave Dean some hope in only a few words. And he was grateful for that, however that still didn't change the tight pain he felt in his chest. 

They had been driving for at least an hour in silence both exchanging quick glances of each other. The rain had worn off but small droplets were still splashing against the windscreen. "So..." Dean voiced, breaking the wall like quietness in the car, "how've you been?" Castiel looked at Dean frowning again.   
"You should be the one answering that Dean. Not me." He stated.   
"Me, well it's all a bit of a roller coast ain't it?" He weakly laughed keeping his eyes on the road and hands firmly on the steering wheel. "So are you gonna answer my question or just sit there and look pretty?" Dean laughed a bit more warm heartedly punching Cas on the arm softly.   
"I'm fine Dean" he finally answered looking down at the spot where Dean had punched him. 

After another hour of driving in silence Dean pulled the car up outside the bunker door and walked around the car to where Castiel was standing. Cas looked up at Dean and smiled, "Goodbye Dean." Placing his hand on Dean's shoulder once again.   
"Whaa! Wait a minute!" Dean grasped hold of Cas' hand desperately before he could disappear. "Man, I'm sure you ain't that busy that you can't come in for a bit." Dean regarded staring hopefully at Castiel pointing to the door.   
"Sure Dean." He replied almost straight away eyes wide. Dean grinned back, still staring at Cas. His eyes. Dean couldn't help but get lost in the intense blue of Castiel's eyes every now and again. Who wouldn't?! Dean noticed a almost awkward look in Castiel's face until he looked down and saw he was still basically holding Cas' hand. He dropped it immediately turning on the spot and opened the bunker door stepping through it, peering from the top of the stairs to find sam. Sam had seemed to have fell asleep on his laptop, his arms crossed on the keyboard and his head resting down on his forearms. Dean looked back at Cas placing a finger on his lips pointing at sam with the other hand. Cas nodded in understanding and closed the heavy door extremely quietly and followed Dean down the stairs. As they got to the bottom of the stairs sam started to stir.   
"Oh, hey Dean." He mumbled tiredly, rubbing his face with his hands and pushing his laptop away from him not yet noticing Castiel standing behind Dean.   
"Hey Sammy." Dean replied pulling out a chair opposite sam and sitting down. Castiel stood at the end of the table his eyes scanning the room. Sam looked up again suddenly noticing Cas.   
"Cas! I never saw you come in. How are you?" Sam asked smiling sleepily.   
"I'm fine Sam how about you?" Cas replied politely smiling back at Sam.   
"I'm good thanks, just really really tired." He half laughed looking back at Dean then to the table. Dean knew Sam was only tired because he was up the night looking for any new leads about the mark of Cain even though he told Sam to stop. Dean felt the pain in his chest tighten and changed the subject before he stopped breathing all together.   
"Beers anyone?" Dean announced standing up looking at Sam and Cas.   
"No thanks Dean." Cas answered.   
"Nah I'm okay." Sam also stood up yawning. "I think I'm gonna get some sleep, see you tomorrow Dean, Cas." Sam gestured nodding at Dean and smiling at Cas as he walked through the room and down the corridor towards his bedroom. Dean sat back down slamming the top of the table and cursing under his breath. Dean knew he had fucked up big time with Sam. Sam was helping Dean but Dean was just pushing him away! God, what was wrong with him! Even when he thought he had control of the mark it still seemed to ruin his damn life.   
"Dean.." Cas started but Dean cut him off.   
"No! I can't...I just can't do this anymore. No matter how much people help me I just shove them outta the way with no care in the world! What the hell is wrong with me?!"  
"Dean, it's not you it's the..."  
"I know! Trust me I know to damn well it's the mark! I'm just getting tired of hurting everyone I know. Over reacting to every damn thing that's said to me. Like now..." Dean kicked the leg of the table frustrated. Cas couldn't stand it anymore either. He was too fed up of seeing Dean constantly on edge about everything just because of that hellish mark. Cas sat down on the chair next to Dean placing both his hand on the table, linking his fingers together and keeping his eyes focused on his hands.   
"Dean..." He began before being cut off again.   
"Cas, please.."  
"Listen to me Dean." Castiel had had enough. "You need to know none of this is your fault Dean. None of it. The mark is taking over. your anger, your rage, your frustration and it's not your fault it's the mark and Dean you need to realise that nobody is trying to stop you living your life or trying to force you to do what you don't want to do we are only trying to help you. And yes I know you knew that but I just needed to tell you again because you were beginning to forget. Dean there are people who care about you. Sam. Charlie. Me. I care Dean. I may not always be here with you but I care. I care I lot about you." Dean heard the temper rise in Castiel's voice as he spoke to him. Dean just sat in his seat looking at the ground like a moody teenager. He hadn't just messed up with Sam now Cas was angry. He didn't know what to do. The angel sat in the seat still staring at his hands not moving a inch.   
"Cas...I, I don't know what to do. I'm not asking for sympathy now I'm asking for help." Dean finally threw back.   
"Help with what Dean?" Castiel asked confused but still angry sounding.   
"With everything." Dean kicked back off the chair and stood up shoving his hands in his jacket pockets. Cas stood up too and placed himself so he was standing right in front of Dean glaring at him. That blue. Dean couldn't help it. Cas's eyes were just so damn blue, but before Dean could step away from the angel Castiel gripped the front of Dean shirt, pulled him close and kissed him. Like full on actual kissed him. Dean stood there in shock his eyes wide. He didn't know how to react! What the hell was happening. Dean saw a flicker of bright blue in front of his eyes when he eventually kissed back. He settled against the soft touch of the angel's lips as they moved across Dean's. Cas placed both of his hands on Dean's shoulders, pulling him in closer. Dean awkwardly placed one hand on cas's waist as they kept in contact. The kiss didn't feel passionate, more like anger mixed with care. And that's what Dean needed the most. Dean's eyes flustered closed leaning into the kiss more eagerly, placing the other hand on Cas's waist holding him firmly into Dean. Cas kissed softly and gently but Dean wanted more. Dean forced Cas into the wall behind him pinning him against it. Castiel's eyes flew open at the shock of the push. Dean however was still determinedly get more from the angel. His kiss got more nasty, bitting roughly at Cas's bottom lip. Cas tried to push Dean off him but he wouldn't move. Dean just got more and more thirsty. Cas decided enough was enough and before Dean realised it Cas had vanished into thin air making Dean fall forward banging his head on the wall. Dean stood for a moment coming to terms with what just happen. Holy shit! Dean screamed in his head. What the hell was he doing?! No wonder Cas flew off! Dean's stomach fell as he slapped his hand to his head in complete failure and discomfort. The mark. He knew it was the mark. It wasn't just making him more angry, but violent and wicked too. Enough's a damn enough! Dean strode over to where Sam was sitting and powered up the laptop. God knows how he was going to ever speak to Cas and again but right know, he was going to find a cure. No matter what it takes.


End file.
